Dear Jack on your 17th Birthday

 

Dear Jack,

Happy birthday! Today you are 17! Although you have basically been telling me you are 17 all school year...particularly when I express concern about letting you go do something. You seem to want so desperately to be independent and grown. The feeling of you pulling away the past few years has been palpable and hard for this mother’s heart to accept. But I know that is what parenting is…trying to raise your kids so they can go out into the world on their own to contribute to society.

You have already proven yourself to be a hard worker. You currently work for a commercial landscaping company and spend long, hard days under the brutal Texas sun, but you never complain.

You are so considerate, always thanking me for making dinner and asking me about my day. I appreciate your thoughtfulness and awareness. You are also kind to your little brother, who is not very little anymore.

I have always worried that you internalize negative thoughts or comments and don’t seem to believe or see the positive things people say and feel about you. This past year, there have been some significant bumps in the road...all part of growing up, but still difficult to navigate. I like to journal my thoughts and feelings on the Notes app on my phone, and I recently wrote one about you that I want to include here in your birthday letter:

“This chapter of life we are in is a difficult read.

But I want you to know…

I love you when you are angry.

I love you when you are lost.

I love you when you are unrecognizable.

I love you.

Always.”

Jack, the day you were born was one of the happiest days of my life. You are such an integral part of our family. I love you so very much, and I am proud to call you my son.

Happy birthday, sweet boy.

Love,

Mom

Dear Ellie on your 20th Birthday

Dear Ellie,

​Happy 20th Birthday! I know I say it every year, but April 13th remains one of my favorite days to celebrate. It’s the day my world changed and I stepped into the role of your mom. 

​Leaving your teens behind is a big milestone. You’re stepping into a whole new decade of your life, and watching you navigate the transition into adulthood with such capability is a gift. This year has not been an easy one for you...surgery, job change, moving, break-up...you haven't let any of it derail you and I am so proud. 

​What I appreciate most right now is the way our relationship continues to grow and transition. I find myaelf reaching out to you for advice or just to share some juicy gossip. It’s a beautiful transition to move from parenting a child to an adult. You have grown into a person I truly admire, not just because you’re my daughter, but because of your character, your sharp mind, and the way you care for the people around you.

​As you enter your twenties, I hope you continue to be exactly who you are. Keep taking risks, keep pushing those boundaries, and keep chasing your goals. You are like your dad...you have such a steady "north star" within you, and I trust your judgment.

​Enjoy every second of being twenty, Ellie. It’s a decade for discovery, and I can’t wait to see where your path leads next. Always remember that no matter how old you get, or how far your adventures take you, home (and your dad and me) will always be here for you.

​I love you more than words can say. Happy Birthday!

​Love you forever,

​Mom

Dear Sam on your 13th birthday

 Dear Sam,

Happy 13th birthday! I can’t believe I am officially writing a letter to my youngest teenager. As I do every year, I wanted to take a moment to put into words just how much I love you and how proud I am of the person you are becoming.

Thirteen is a big milestone, but you have already grown into such a remarkable young man. There are so many things I admire about you.  

 You are always the first one ready for a new experience or an adventure. Your up-for-anything attitude makes life so much more fun.

 I have to admit, you have truly mastered the art of persuasion. You have this way of talking me into almost anything! It’s a gift, Sam, so use it wisely.

 I am so incredibly proud of how hard you work. I see the effort you put into your academics and the grit you show on the football field. You don’t do anything halfway, and that dedication is going to take you so far in life.

 One of the things I respect most about you is your honesty. Even when you’ve made a mistake or done something wrong, you have the courage to tell the truth...even when it means "telling on yourself." Being trustworthy is a rare quality, and I hope you never lose that.

I absolutely love our talks. Your curiosity and those deep, thought-provoking questions you ask always keep me on my toes. I really appreciate the fact that you still like to spend time with me. 

You have such a wonderful sense of humor and a way of making everyone around you smile. It may be your birthday today, but I am the one who received the ultimate present. Being your mom is the greatest joy, and I truly feel like you are a gift to me every single day.

I can’t wait to see what this next year brings for you. Happy birthday, Sambo!

Love always,

Mom