Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Snap back to reality
My mom left today. I won't lie, I shed a few tears. She has been so amazing the past two weeks. I just don't know how I am going to survive without her. I have a feeling Ellie will be watching way too much TV and I will be getting way too little sleep. I tried to get a picture of Mom with the kids before she left, but Ellie was not cooperating (totally normal for her these days) and Jack was hungry (also totally normal).
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Sunday Best
Ellie was once again the only one getting dressed for church this morning. My mom came by to pick her up when I was still in my pajamas (church starts at 12:30, but I was still in my pajamas). That's cuz Jack and I are going to be doing a lot of sleeping today to make up for last night!
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Happy
After I had Ellie, I was a mess. I have already documented my case of the crazies so I won't bother recapping it. This time around, I tried to prepare myself for the surge of hormones. I know how I get when I am sleep deprived and it ain't pretty. But surprisingly, things have been pretty great. I just feel...happy. Tired, but happy.
Of course, I have been stressed with the whole jaundice thing, but it isn't putting me over the edge like it would have after having Ellie. I think this is mostly because my mom is here. She is amazing. She does all the cooking and cleaning and entertaining of Ellie. This morning she is off taking care of Kolby and Olivia and I was a little apprehensive about being left alone with two whole children all by myself! But I have had such a lovely morning. Jack has slept through most of it and Ellie and I have played and cuddled. I decided to put her hair into pigtails so she would quit reminding me of a teenager. 
Of course, she had to pose for all of them. She has been her old, sweet self all morning and I am so happy she is back. I missed the old Ellie.
Of course, I have been stressed with the whole jaundice thing, but it isn't putting me over the edge like it would have after having Ellie. I think this is mostly because my mom is here. She is amazing. She does all the cooking and cleaning and entertaining of Ellie. This morning she is off taking care of Kolby and Olivia and I was a little apprehensive about being left alone with two whole children all by myself! But I have had such a lovely morning. Jack has slept through most of it and Ellie and I have played and cuddled. I decided to put her hair into pigtails so she would quit reminding me of a teenager. 
Of course, she had to pose for all of them. She has been her old, sweet self all morning and I am so happy she is back. I missed the old Ellie.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Update from the walking zombie
Things have been pretty eventful around here. Jack's jaundice is not getting better. He spent Friday thru Sunday strapped to bilirubin lights only to discover that his levels actually increased. We have had to take him to the doctor's office every day so they can prick his heel and milk out blood. Hate it. Every time I walk in there, I am so paranoid he will pick up some disease. Now they have us going to the hospital to do it as an outpatient thing and every time I go I have to fill out the exact same stack of papers, the same papers they use to admit someone to the hospital. So annoying. I get a break today and then am taking him back tomorrow. And I can't drive (doctor's orders) so my mom is acting as chauffeur. It is stressful, but I am thankful that for the most part he seems really strong and healthy. Holy cow is this kid strong. He has been lifting his head and looking around since birth. He pushes up off me and even rolled to his side on the changing table. He also had regained his birth weight just two days out of the hospital on account of him being a champion nurser. Is this the face of a newborn? Doesn't he look like a month old and not a week old?
Ellie does great with Jack. She is so gentle and genuinely seems to love him. We stopped by Target on our way back from the doctor yesterday and I stepped away from the stroller for a second to get something off the shelf. A lady happened to be standing near the stroller and Ellie said to her in a loud, protective voice, "Excuse me, but this is MY baby!" And then she took the stroller and attempted to wheel it away. So adorable. Not so adorable is her attitude with everyone else. She has morphed into a rebellious teen. She doesn't listen, she talks back, and she comes up with some incredibly hurtful things to say that leaves Tom and I bewildered as to where on earth she could have learned that. My mom has been amazing with her, showering her with attention, but what she really needs is my attention. I try, but between all of Jack's appointments, his hour long nursing sessions, and just trying to recover from surgery, I don't have the time I used to. I have been trying to make a real effort, though. I know it is a huge adjustment for her. Speaking of, I better go play with her because it sounds like her cupcake making session with my mom is over!
Ellie does great with Jack. She is so gentle and genuinely seems to love him. We stopped by Target on our way back from the doctor yesterday and I stepped away from the stroller for a second to get something off the shelf. A lady happened to be standing near the stroller and Ellie said to her in a loud, protective voice, "Excuse me, but this is MY baby!" And then she took the stroller and attempted to wheel it away. So adorable. Not so adorable is her attitude with everyone else. She has morphed into a rebellious teen. She doesn't listen, she talks back, and she comes up with some incredibly hurtful things to say that leaves Tom and I bewildered as to where on earth she could have learned that. My mom has been amazing with her, showering her with attention, but what she really needs is my attention. I try, but between all of Jack's appointments, his hour long nursing sessions, and just trying to recover from surgery, I don't have the time I used to. I have been trying to make a real effort, though. I know it is a huge adjustment for her. Speaking of, I better go play with her because it sounds like her cupcake making session with my mom is over!
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Sunday Best: Big Sister edition
My mom took Ellie to church today since Jack, of course, is too little to go. Not that he could anyway, since he spends his days and nights clad only in a diaper with a bilirubin blanket wrapped around his tummy. We can only take him off it to feed and change him. I really look forward to our hour long nursing sessions so I can cuddle him. Ellie would not have put up with this when she was a baby. She hated being strapped into her carseat or put down. Jack just chills in his bouncer (the bili blanket is tucked under a regular blanket). Ellie wanted to do her Sunday Best pictures with him this morning. She is such a poser! Her necklace says #1 Big Sister. I have to agree.
I realize it is time for me to change the title of my blog. I am thinking All Ellie and Jack (so original) or Pieces of Me. What do you think?
Friday, October 16, 2009
Jack's (very wordy) Birth Story
I finally have a little bit of time to sit down and type. Tom has taken Ellie to the park, my mom is cooking dinner, and Jack is strapped to a bilirubin blanket that he has to stay on for up to 18 hours a day for jaundice. He is such a sweet little guy and doesn’t complain.
This is my birth story for Jack, like Ellie’s birth story it is going to be long, but I like to document it all for journaling purposes. Feel free to just skip over all those words and check out the pictures instead!
Last weekend, I wasn’t feeling well. I had this constant headache and just an overall sense of exhaustion so I spent a lot of time in bed and no time getting my house in order or preparing for a baby. I had a doctor’s appointment Monday morning because when I had gone in the week before I complained about not seeing my actual doctor in 2 ½ months! I was really worried about having someone slice me open who hadn’t even seen me in forever. So they fit me in Monday morning. I dropped Ellie off at Tom’s cross country practice and made plans to meet up with them for lunch. Being the vain person that I am, I barely ate anything for breakfast so that my weight would appear lower. My appointment was fine. My blood pressure was high, but not scary high, and my urine was clear. However, I casually mentioned that I had this nagging headache and next thing I knew the doctor was sending me to the hospital to get my blood pressure monitored. I was more annoyed than concerned because I had so much to do that day but I headed over to the hospital to get strapped up to the machines. I had my G1 phone with me so I entertained myself on Facebook, typing stuff like “At hospital hooked up to monitors. Bored and hungry.” The baby was looking great on the monitors and my blood pressure was still high, but still not too high. I was having fairly regular contractions, but I had been having those for weeks. Still, my doctor ordered some blood work to be done so my hour on the machines turned to two. I cancelled lunch plans with Tom and Ellie and instead started contemplating all the things I needed to do before my c-section on Thursday. Suddenly, the curtain is pulled aside and there is my doctor telling me we are going to do my c-section today, right now, and to get changed! I went into panic mode. I wasn’t prepared; I didn’t even have a bag packed. I lived almost an hour from the hospital and Tom still had to drop Ellie off with Rosie! I called Tom up and told him to throw some things in a bag, call Rosie, and hurry to the hospital. Suddenly, Tom was acting crazy. He forgot everything, like where we store suitcases, how to dress Ellie, how to speak in complete sentences. For a one night stay, he ended up packing Ellie a bag that contained three pairs of pajamas and three pairs of panties. Nothing else. And he didn’t get anything I asked him to bring for me. While all this was going on, I was frantically texting people telling them the change in plans. I was also terrified. Throughout this pregnancy, I have had this fear that I was going to die during the surgery. So dramatic, I know, which is why I only shared that fear with Tom. Well, now I was being thrown into it without being able to mentally prepare myself. I wanted to tell everyone that I had changed my mind, that I no longer wanted to have a baby, and that I was just going to go home.
When Tom finally made it to the hospital, they rushed me back to surgery. It took them awhile to do the spinal and get me situated before they could let Tom in. I was so scared that whole time, even though I had gone through it all before. Once Tom came in, though, and they escorted him to a seat by my head, I felt much calmer. The surgery went fine, except that baby Jack could not fit through the incision and they ended up using the vacuum to get him out. One of the benefits of a c-section, I think, is the fact that you get babies with perfectly shaped heads. Another benefit is being able to schedule it at your convenience. Both benefits were ruined for me! However, once I heard Jack crying, I felt that same rush of happiness I felt with Ellie…just indescribable. I was able to hold him very briefly for a few pictures and then Tom and Jack went off to the nursery and I was taken to recovery.
Because I had been diagnosed with pregnancy induced hypertension (PIH, thus the reason for the fast track delivery) I had to be put on magnesium sulfate. That stuff makes you miserable and a little crazy. So crazy, in fact, that they won’t let you be alone with you child. Still, while in recovery, I found the time to update Facebook with “In recovery. Baby so cute! 9lb 5 oz, 21 in.” Because of the magnesium, they kept me in Labor and Delivery for 24 hours before moving me to Postpartum. I was a little out of it, but I received wonderful care from my very attentive nurses.
Tom was also with me for the entire hospital stay and he truly is the best. He comforted me during my late night panic attacks, changed all diapers, and was basically at my beck and call for four days straight. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful husband.
So, my birth story did not go exactly as planned, but I am so thankful that it went as smoothly as it did and that Jack is healthy (for the most part). He is so sweet and my fears of not being able to love him as much as Ellie have been proven to be unfounded. As for Ellie, she loves her baby brother and can’t get enough of him. I just couldn’t be happier with my little family.
This is my birth story for Jack, like Ellie’s birth story it is going to be long, but I like to document it all for journaling purposes. Feel free to just skip over all those words and check out the pictures instead!
Last weekend, I wasn’t feeling well. I had this constant headache and just an overall sense of exhaustion so I spent a lot of time in bed and no time getting my house in order or preparing for a baby. I had a doctor’s appointment Monday morning because when I had gone in the week before I complained about not seeing my actual doctor in 2 ½ months! I was really worried about having someone slice me open who hadn’t even seen me in forever. So they fit me in Monday morning. I dropped Ellie off at Tom’s cross country practice and made plans to meet up with them for lunch. Being the vain person that I am, I barely ate anything for breakfast so that my weight would appear lower. My appointment was fine. My blood pressure was high, but not scary high, and my urine was clear. However, I casually mentioned that I had this nagging headache and next thing I knew the doctor was sending me to the hospital to get my blood pressure monitored. I was more annoyed than concerned because I had so much to do that day but I headed over to the hospital to get strapped up to the machines. I had my G1 phone with me so I entertained myself on Facebook, typing stuff like “At hospital hooked up to monitors. Bored and hungry.” The baby was looking great on the monitors and my blood pressure was still high, but still not too high. I was having fairly regular contractions, but I had been having those for weeks. Still, my doctor ordered some blood work to be done so my hour on the machines turned to two. I cancelled lunch plans with Tom and Ellie and instead started contemplating all the things I needed to do before my c-section on Thursday. Suddenly, the curtain is pulled aside and there is my doctor telling me we are going to do my c-section today, right now, and to get changed! I went into panic mode. I wasn’t prepared; I didn’t even have a bag packed. I lived almost an hour from the hospital and Tom still had to drop Ellie off with Rosie! I called Tom up and told him to throw some things in a bag, call Rosie, and hurry to the hospital. Suddenly, Tom was acting crazy. He forgot everything, like where we store suitcases, how to dress Ellie, how to speak in complete sentences. For a one night stay, he ended up packing Ellie a bag that contained three pairs of pajamas and three pairs of panties. Nothing else. And he didn’t get anything I asked him to bring for me. While all this was going on, I was frantically texting people telling them the change in plans. I was also terrified. Throughout this pregnancy, I have had this fear that I was going to die during the surgery. So dramatic, I know, which is why I only shared that fear with Tom. Well, now I was being thrown into it without being able to mentally prepare myself. I wanted to tell everyone that I had changed my mind, that I no longer wanted to have a baby, and that I was just going to go home.When Tom finally made it to the hospital, they rushed me back to surgery. It took them awhile to do the spinal and get me situated before they could let Tom in. I was so scared that whole time, even though I had gone through it all before. Once Tom came in, though, and they escorted him to a seat by my head, I felt much calmer. The surgery went fine, except that baby Jack could not fit through the incision and they ended up using the vacuum to get him out. One of the benefits of a c-section, I think, is the fact that you get babies with perfectly shaped heads. Another benefit is being able to schedule it at your convenience. Both benefits were ruined for me! However, once I heard Jack crying, I felt that same rush of happiness I felt with Ellie…just indescribable. I was able to hold him very briefly for a few pictures and then Tom and Jack went off to the nursery and I was taken to recovery.
Because I had been diagnosed with pregnancy induced hypertension (PIH, thus the reason for the fast track delivery) I had to be put on magnesium sulfate. That stuff makes you miserable and a little crazy. So crazy, in fact, that they won’t let you be alone with you child. Still, while in recovery, I found the time to update Facebook with “In recovery. Baby so cute! 9lb 5 oz, 21 in.” Because of the magnesium, they kept me in Labor and Delivery for 24 hours before moving me to Postpartum. I was a little out of it, but I received wonderful care from my very attentive nurses.Tom was also with me for the entire hospital stay and he truly is the best. He comforted me during my late night panic attacks, changed all diapers, and was basically at my beck and call for four days straight. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful husband.
So, my birth story did not go exactly as planned, but I am so thankful that it went as smoothly as it did and that Jack is healthy (for the most part). He is so sweet and my fears of not being able to love him as much as Ellie have been proven to be unfounded. As for Ellie, she loves her baby brother and can’t get enough of him. I just couldn’t be happier with my little family. 
Monday, October 12, 2009
welcome, jack
i am typing from my phone in the hospital. a little loopy from the magnesium. see my twitter updates on the right side bar at the bottom for the scoop! pics and story to follow.
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
Budding artist
All of Ellie's drawings lately have been pictures of me. The circles in the middle are my belly, more specifically known as "Baby Jack." Notice how the circle gets bigger and bigger? I think my belly causes Ellie some concern. Several times a day she offers to lighten my load. "I can help you carry your belly, Mommy." And then she puts her two little hands on my stomach and walks with me. I love that kid.Tuesday, October 06, 2009
The perks of maternity leave
I am loving being on maternity leave! It is awesome when you don't actually have a pesky newborn to take up all the time! This morning? I made eggs, bacon, and hash browns for breakfast. Yeah, that's right...I am also letting myself eat whatever my little heart desires. It is this experiment I am doing, see? I have not gained a single pound in the past month and yet I have been eating whatever I want without any guilt. It's like a miracle. Although my stomach does keep growing. I am just trying to enjoy it now since I know in like 9 days I am going to have to start eating verrrrry sensible and boring.
Another good thing about maternity leave besides the food? Having the time to do the little things like clean out my cupboards. That's how I spent a good part of yesterday. It started with me sterilizing a few bottles, but then I realized I had no place to put them so I started cleaning out a cupboard. Well, before I knew it, one cupboard let to another until I accidentally dropped the lid to the rice steamer and it shattered all over the floor. And that's when I moved on to sweeping and mopping the kitchen.
But the very best part of maternity leave is being able to spend one last week alone with Ellie. I bought her a bunch of presents to give to her at random moments after Jack is born. But I have a hard time waiting to give them to her! I already gave her the Disney princess tea set (which she loves) and the other night right after her bath I felt this need to give her a dress up set. Not good timing since we were planning on putting her to bed, but I just love to give her things. She gets so excited...thank you Mommy, thank you! I know there is more to life than just presents and material things, but they sure are helpful in keeping her occupied when I am trying to do stuff like clean up glass off the kitchen floor.
Another good thing about maternity leave besides the food? Having the time to do the little things like clean out my cupboards. That's how I spent a good part of yesterday. It started with me sterilizing a few bottles, but then I realized I had no place to put them so I started cleaning out a cupboard. Well, before I knew it, one cupboard let to another until I accidentally dropped the lid to the rice steamer and it shattered all over the floor. And that's when I moved on to sweeping and mopping the kitchen.
But the very best part of maternity leave is being able to spend one last week alone with Ellie. I bought her a bunch of presents to give to her at random moments after Jack is born. But I have a hard time waiting to give them to her! I already gave her the Disney princess tea set (which she loves) and the other night right after her bath I felt this need to give her a dress up set. Not good timing since we were planning on putting her to bed, but I just love to give her things. She gets so excited...thank you Mommy, thank you! I know there is more to life than just presents and material things, but they sure are helpful in keeping her occupied when I am trying to do stuff like clean up glass off the kitchen floor.
Thursday, October 01, 2009
To medicate or not to medicate
I went ahead and filled the prescription for Tamiflu that my OB gave me, but still hesitated to take it even though it was pretty dang expensive! After doing a lot of research (and I use the term research loosely here, ahem Google) I have decided to hold off on taking it. I just can't justify taking it when I have NO symptoms of the flu! I think I will hold onto it and take it at the first sign or give it to Tom if he shows any symptoms. Part of my reasoning is that I am pretty sure Ellie had the regular flu and not H1N1. Both Tom and I got our flu shots at school last Wednesday, but Ellie had not gotten a shot. So, I feel like we have a little protection against it. Of course, I find out today that a teacher at my school whose baby is at Ellie's daycare is now at home with her baby because he tested positive for swine flu. I am really nervous about putting baby Jack in daycare in January when it is still flu season. I guess we will just cross that bridge when we come to it.
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