Dear Jack,
Happy birthday! I can't believe you are already 12. A young man. And an outstanding young man at that. You are smart, wickedly funny, empathetic, hard-working, and handsome as all get out. I just think you are pretty terrific and I am so excited to celebrate the day you joined our family.
Before I had you, I had a miscarriage. So, you can imagine how thrilled we were when we found out I was pregnant with you. You were so, so wanted. After you were born, I felt connected to you right away. It was like I could sense exactly how you were feeling and what you needed. I absolutely loved holding you and cuddling you every chance I got. Finally, I understood what people meant by a mother's instinct. I have always loved our special bond. As you are growing and maturing, it has been difficult for me to let go. I so badly want to hold you close and keep you my sweet little boy forever. I know that sounds creepy, but there it is.
Now you are growing up and pulling away, as is expected. You spend more time holed up in your room. You no longer tell me everything and I no longer am able to sense exactly what you need. But I hope you know that I see you. I know you. You are such an incredible person and I couldn't be prouder of the man you are becoming. If I could have one birthday wish for you, it would be that you could find joy daily. Life is brutiful...always try to see the beauty amidst the brutal.
So, what's going on with you right now? You started middle school, you are in theatre, you recently started taking guitar lessons, you like to skateboard (sometimes), you still love to read, you and your sister Ellie are as thick as thieves, and you are killing it in school. Oh, and you became our official lawn mower this past year. I may be resisting you getting older, but I sure am happy you are old enough to mow (and at a discounted rate)!
Sweet boy, I know I am not surprising you with a trip to Disney like I did last year, but I hope that you still have a wonderful birthday and that you feel how very loved you are.
Happy birthday, Jack-Jack.
Love you forever,
Mom
